The start

 I can't even begin to count how many times I have tried to create my serenity place.  You know, that perfect spot that just makes you feel calm and relaxed.  Life seems to be moving so fast, and it can be so stressful we all crave that place of peace.  My life has been a rocky road, with lots of ups and downs and I really have never found that place that just takes it all away. Until now.   I remember when we bought our first home, cute small house in a cute small town.  Life seemed full of excitement.  The plans I had, the things I was going to do to make this place my dream.  I started house renovations, while I loved making the space my own, it came with stress and anxiety at the same time.  We were running on limited funds, and let's face it, projects cost.  They cost more than money, they cost the time, the dedication and you have to be on the same page.  Every step ahead, I just found myself wanting more, something else...

  So this is a bit of a different post, more of a rant I suppose.  As you all know my oldest son is big into rodeo.  This year he decided to join the Canadian pro circuit, and is doing well, he is sitting 9th overall in the Jr. Steer riding.  If you do not follow rodeo, this is a huge accomplishment.  He is competing against kids from all across Canada.  So it is safe to say, with him I am raising a rodeo kid.  Rodeo kids are just a different breed.  They are hard headed, dedicated and passionate about what they do.  Due to his new schedule of chasing the pro rodeos, the last few months of school he has had to miss a day or sometimes two every week.  My son does not struggle with school, he is smart.  His grades are good, learning the materials is not what is hard for him, what is hard for him is the format that they learn.  Some kids just are not built to sit in a classroom for that long every day.  I am not saying school...

 I have been pretty quiet about this unless you are inside my inner circle, but this has gotten out of control and I am ready to put this out there for everyone to read, especially that special someone that is doing this to me.  I met my current spouse around the end of January 2023.  We met through a dating app, and never thought it would amount to much due to the distance.  Little did we know it was the beginning of something amazing.  We were four hours apart, but talked every single night for hours on the phone, messaged each other daily and it just bloomed.  We eventually met in March 2023 in person and the rest is history.  We now live happily together making our dream life a reality.  I would not change this for the world, I feel I truly met the person made for me.  Things are not always so fairytale.  Lets get into it, when did the stalking begin and when did it end.   The end of March 2023, early April I came to where ...

 Life is continually moving, it never slows down or speeds up, its moving on at the same pace but I find myself feeling like it is moving so fast lately.  When your kids are little, time seems to move so slow.  I found myself thinking, Oh I can not wait until the next stage, I can't wait until they can walk, or they can talk.  I couldn't wait to watch them go to school make friends, start playing sports.  You want the world for them and you just seem to be in a hurry to see it.  Then the next second it seems they have grown up and those days at home with your littles is over, and you long for those days back.  You miss snuggling that baby, listening to them sleep, watching their little faces experience the world.  You blink and it's gone.  You never again will hold that small child in your arm again.   I read a quote once that really brought me to tears, while I do not remember exactly how it went it was something like:  There ...

 If you have been following along with my journey on this blog, you'll know I completely changed my life recently.  Moving myself and my kids four hours away from our home, the place I have lived my entire life and starting new.  With this came some changes,  I have gone from a full time working mom to a stay at home mom.  Sounds amazing right?  It's.. conflicting and to say I am 100% loving it would be a lie.  Now I know some of you are shaking your heads at me screaming, this is it, this is the dream! To be able to stay home and raise your children without the added stress of work, how can I complain about that?!  Well hopefully I can describe it for you.... When I was pregnant with my first son I was working at a local motel cleaning rooms, nothing glamorous but it was a pay cheque.  Remember I started life early, finding out I was pregnant in the last few months of my grade twelve year.  I had already been at the motel part time thro...

Let's talk about kids, the light of our lives, the things you love and want to protect from the world.  Honestly though, have you ever just wanted to bundle them up in bubble wrap and shield them from all of the pain and ugly in the world?  I know I did.  I wanted to keep them from ever feeling pain, or hurt.  I remember one time all of my kids had a bad flu, and they were up crying and throwing up and just feeling awful.  I sat up with them crying, wishing I could take on everything they were feeling just to spare them, to take it all away.   I am sure every parent has had this feeling, wanting to take the hurt on themselves to spare the kids.  Unfortunately we live in a world where that just is not possible.  Growing up, they have to go through all of life's ups and downs.  It is your job as their parents to guide them through this, to learn to take on the pain, but learn to release it and let it go as well.  We have to teach them...