The start

Are parents allowed to say they are burnt out?  Is this a thing?  This is the time of year for me I seem to feel it the most.  I am tired.  I am here wearing clothes I have had for years, some bras are literally on their last threads, while my kids are sporting new hockey sticks and gear.   I want the world for my kids and I do everything in my power to give it to them, or help them get there.  It just adds up, we go from football, to hockey, to rodeo and baseball.  There is not stop in-between the sports in this house.  It is a year round cycle.  Now now I know what you are saying as you read this.  If you can't handle it, stop the sports.  Here's the thing, I can complain, I can be tired but that is one thing I won't do.  I will not take this from their childhood so my life can be a little less hectic.  When we have kids its kind of this invisible contact.  You are there to support them, to be their everything ...

 I didn't think I would be writing another post about being a stay at home mom.  Again if you follow along you probably read the post about how last winter I transitioned from working mom to a stay at home mom and the challenges that came along with that.  It was a confusing and hard time, but I have learned to love this role.  My kids are warm, fed, and healthy.  That is the main goal is it not?  I have this opportunity to be at home, take care of the kids and be able to make every single activity, appointment, play date, or whatever it may be.  I get to be there.  Do we have to be slightly more careful with money without two incomes, of course we do, but right now its working and working well.  The kids didn't have to cut back in extra programs, in fact now they are able to do more.  We now have the freedom to be able to attend more things, get more things done at home, and be relaxed and happy doing it!       Recen...

 Today is a little bit of a heavy blog.  It is something that has been weighing heavily on me lately, and this seems to be my outlet to let things out.  I find the more I type it out the more I feel it and begin to understand it.  Lets talk anger.  Anger is a complex emotion that everyone tells you, let go.  Let it go and it will feel so much better and give you the relief you have been searching for.  For me personally I thought I had let go of this anger years ago.  Turns out I didn't let it go, I pushed it down and now its surfacing like crazy.  I have gone back and forth on if I should write this for people to read, but I thought I wonder how many people out there are in similar situations and are struggling as well?  So I guess lets get into it.      If you read along with this blog you know I separated from my husband in 2022.  This circumstances around it are all in here previous so I won't go into great detail...

      I have not wrote any blogs in awhile and its because our life has been a crazy whirlwind lately.  Our yard and lives have literally been torn up and tossed around all because we love our little family and will do anything for it.  Let's get into it.          This all started a few years ago when we got the information that my spouses father had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's.  My spouse was worried about them being so far away, so I chimed in, why can't we move their house to our yard?  I think this took him by surprise.  He looked at me baffled, "You would be ok with that?"  ..... Why on earth would I not be okay with that?  That is what you do for family.  Your parents raised you, they put off their own stuff in life to make sure you had everything you needed, and still do.  It is the very least we can do to return the favor.  So, other family members were called plans were made and h...

 I can't even begin to count how many times I have tried to create my serenity place.  You know, that perfect spot that just makes you feel calm and relaxed.  Life seems to be moving so fast, and it can be so stressful we all crave that place of peace.  My life has been a rocky road, with lots of ups and downs and I really have never found that place that just takes it all away. Until now.   I remember when we bought our first home, cute small house in a cute small town.  Life seemed full of excitement.  The plans I had, the things I was going to do to make this place my dream.  I started house renovations, while I loved making the space my own, it came with stress and anxiety at the same time.  We were running on limited funds, and let's face it, projects cost.  They cost more than money, they cost the time, the dedication and you have to be on the same page.  Every step ahead, I just found myself wanting more, something else...

  So this is a bit of a different post, more of a rant I suppose.  As you all know my oldest son is big into rodeo.  This year he decided to join the Canadian pro circuit, and is doing well, he is sitting 9th overall in the Jr. Steer riding.  If you do not follow rodeo, this is a huge accomplishment.  He is competing against kids from all across Canada.  So it is safe to say, with him I am raising a rodeo kid.  Rodeo kids are just a different breed.  They are hard headed, dedicated and passionate about what they do.  Due to his new schedule of chasing the pro rodeos, the last few months of school he has had to miss a day or sometimes two every week.  My son does not struggle with school, he is smart.  His grades are good, learning the materials is not what is hard for him, what is hard for him is the format that they learn.  Some kids just are not built to sit in a classroom for that long every day.  I am not saying school...